If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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