Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
You did what with his pubic hair?
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