Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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