you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize