We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
