Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize