i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
