That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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