I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Of course I have a pirate flag
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
