you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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