You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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