he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
