spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
