They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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