So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
