so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
you're hired as official boob wrangler
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
