kristin has been a bad kristin
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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