i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
