i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
