the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
