How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
