sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
