doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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