Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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