so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
