I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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