Those balls look pretty dangerous.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
