Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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