hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
