I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
