Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
