did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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