I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize