Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
