Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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