i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
You have to summon your inner elephant
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
