No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
