Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
My friends, they love my intelligence
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Randomize
