I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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