Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize