Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
