Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize