I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
smell my finger.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
