A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
