My room smells like vodka and shame
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize
