what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize