You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
