I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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