You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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