We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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