He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
nutella sex= disaster
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
