If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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